“If you are to free your heart, you must embrace your painful feelings, have faith that your thoughts will arise and cease of their accord. They will pass if you can face them head on, with kind eyes. Your thoughts and feelings will dissolve if you don’t try to hold on to them or push them away. Thinking will dissipate. Trust in this universal law of change.” ~ Valerie Mason-John from her book “Detox Your Heart: Meditations for Healing Emotional Trauma”
We are each products of our life experiences. We grow and evolve with every experience we have. Be it a happy experience or a traumatic one.
Traumatic experiences have the tendency to leave unhealed wounds on our psyche. They are those nasty cracks through which anxiety, stress, depression etc. can easily manifest themselves. Hence healing these deep seated emotional traumas is necessary for your overall well-being.
Usually a sudden illness, an accident, an assault, death of a loved one, a natural disaster – are all traumatic experiences which can upset and distress us. They bring about very powerful and disturbing feelings in us which usually settle in time, without any professional help. But sometimes they don’t. This is when you should know that the trauma is too deep and needs extra care and attention to heal.
Before I share with you the 6 Positive Ways of healing from emotional trauma, let’s first understand the common triggers of emotional trauma.
Some Common Triggers of Emotional Trauma:
- Loss of health
- Loss of job/Unemployment
- Loss of financial stability
- Loss of a friendship
- Loss after a natural calamity
- Relationship breakup or Divorce
- Death of a loved one
- Death of a pet
- Loss of unfulfilled dreams
- Serious illness of loved one
We all experience some form of emotional trauma in our lifetimes. Emotional trauma can be caused by events in any aspect of our life. Some I have stated above, and some you very well know of from personal experience.
Emotional trauma affects us physically and psychologically. It can cause us to become detached from ourselves as well as others, leading to isolation and loneliness. Anxiety, fears and insecurities that we never knew existed come up to trouble us. Emotional trauma is truly crippling. Our ability to establish meaningful relationships with people is deeply affected.
This pain can take a long time to go away, for us to feel safe again. Psychological trauma can make us suffer from troubling memories, anxiety and emotions.
When we experience trauma, it causes a shock to our minds, bodies and souls, which can lead to emotional problems in the future. There are psychological, cognitive, behavioural and physical reactions to emotional trauma.
Some of the common ways we react to emotional trauma are increased arousal, post traumatic stress disorder, avoidance of social gatherings. Enhanced feelings of anger or irritability, reactiveness. We can carry a sense of guilt and shame which affects our every move. Grief and depression become a common by product of unhealed emotional trauma…sometimes leading to alcohol/drug abuse.
Untreated emotional trauma also has serious physical side effects namely: panic attacks, edginess, agitation, insomnia, nightmares, chronic fatigue, difficulty concentrating, muscle tension and a rapid heartbeat are all physical symptoms of emotional stress.
The pain and suffering feels like an eternity but as with all events in life, time can heal all wounds…if we allow it.
Life has a way of throwing pain at us so unexpectedly, that although we might be strong individuals it can still shake us to the core. Trauma on its own is very hard to heal from, then add to that people saying, ‘Just focus on yourself.’ or ‘Buck up, you’re are strong woman’….can be easier said than done. When it feels like we are carrying the weight of the world on our shoulders, even waking up in the morning can feel like such a mammoth task. It’s almost like numbness sets in.
Hence, the first and only rule to healing from trauma is to ‘keep it simple’. Anything remotely complicated can’t even be thought of, let alone attempted. Also, as a living example of healing from trauma myself (violent ex husband, Death of father at a very young age, death of younger brother to sudden accident, loss of financial stability, divorce, loss of friendships, heartbreaks etc.) I can assure you it is possible to heal from trauma. But mind you, it is an ongoing process.
Emotional Trauma Recovery is best to be looked upon as a process that is worked on over time and in intentional positive stages.
On the vibe of “keep it simple” as you begin your trauma healing, here are six positively simple but necessary ways that will facilitate healing:
- Desire only Healing: Understand that the trauma you went through was not your fault. Don’t allow the reactive ego to tell you otherwise. The ego will throw negative reactions everytime you try to heal from trauma, understand that this is NOT you, its the ego. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to feel good about yourself and you truly deserve to heal. So, first and foremost make your healing a priority. The rest will just flow.
- Daily Physical Movement: Walking, running, yoga, stretching just about any form of movement has the ability to release endorphins in your brain that make you feel stable and safe. It is very important to do some form of regular exercise as this regular release of endorphins has the ability to set your mind and heart in balance. This daily activity slowly makes you generate positive energy which is vital to your emotional healing from trauma.
- Daily Motivation: Podcasts, books, ebooks, ted talks etc. there are so many ways we can get good healing information today should we chose to find it. As a daily practice listen to or read something motivating. Whatever or whoever you like, doesn’t matter, as long as it inspires you. To this day, my morning ritual still includes a short prayer, a nature walk and listening to anyone of my favorite motivational authors like Deepak Chopra, Bruce Lipton, Louise Hay, Wayne Dyer etc. Consciously listening to positively healing content triggers positive responses in your heart and mind. These triggers help you reset back to normalcy or a more stable state of mind which you were in prior to the trauma.
- Accept Support: When we are in pain or a deep state of emotional trauma, we tend to isolate ourselves from the world around us, because we don’t want to show a weak self to the world. That is again the ego not allowing you to heal. Infact, asking for help and accepting support from friends and family is one the best ways to come back to centre. Talking heart to heart with a loved one, without judgment is sometimes the best medicine. It brings back that safe space that you truly need to heal.
- Meditate Daily: Meditation has been proven to heal even the darkest of wounds and place you in the palm of happiness. It’s one of those magical pills you can use to set yourself right. A daily meditation practice allows you to experience states of thoughtlessness, rest and Divine wisdom. The beauty of a meditation practice is, it can be done in solitude or in a group…both offering great benefits to your emotional healing. You can find wonderful guided meditations online and also find group meditations in your local community to begin with.
- Get Trained Help: Emotional trauma gets stored in parts of our psyche which becomes hard for us to reach and/or understand. Healing from it requires a multifaceted approach, which a trained therapist/counselor can offer you. It becomes a safe space for you to release suppressed emotions, open up about hurtful memories and simply understand your trauma in a whole new light. This kind of non-judgmental support is essential to your emotional healing.
Healing and Recovery are the primary goals for souls who have experienced trauma, for their families, and other loved ones. Everyone in the path of trauma gets affected by it. Hence, healing does not necessarily mean complete freedom from post-traumatic affects. Healing is a very personal and an individual experience and will be different for different people. But in general healing from emotional trauma is the ability to live with joy in the present without being overwhelmed by the negative thoughts and feelings of the past.
While experiencing emotional pain it’s hard to believe that healing can happen, but you must remember the heart does heal. Gently love yourself enough to believe that you too deserve happiness, that you too deserve refuge from the debilitaing pain and suffering. When we make positive efforts towards healing ourselves, we’ll experience new levels of happiness and vitality once you’ve healed.
Now its your turn…Have you healed from emotional trauma before? Do you have any special ways you did so? Please share them in the comments below. Lets support each others healing!
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